Category: Baby
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Charliepants: "Mama, can you put on your talking show?". Mama,smiling and thinking: See, all the NPR will pay off. Screw Paulie and his Arthur and his singalongs and his knowing all the names on Paw Patrol. Little kids DO like the things I like. I AM a fun mom. "Oh honey, do you like mama's…
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When I give him food that is hot, with the predictable parental warning—“wait for it to cool down honey”, Charlie says “Warm, Mama, warm. I’m going to wait for it to get WARM.” Happy Birthday Charlie. You adorable little shit.
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The ruckus was terrible. Stomping feet up the stairs, the sound of the high pressure shower setting splashing water everywhere, the unmistakable whine of a resisting toddler. What on earth is going on? After some intervention, my best soothing voice and a little triage—it was poop. “Honey, poop is not an emergency”. ”It is when…
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We’re on hour two of Easter basket amusement. Who says kids don’t like post it notes and twist ties? Also, Paulie is barfing downstairs. In the bathroom that has plastic garbage bags taped up on the walls where we ripped out the shower tile. {Sips coffee}
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Some moments with toddlers are unforgettable, some are unbelievable, and some are one hundred percent the legacy of Pat Mikkelsen’s child rearing. Me: “Oh Charlie, you are so fucking beautiful!” Charlie: “Mama, you’re fucking beautiful every day!”
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I have a sheet of stickers. Charlie comes over, asks for a sticker, gets a sticker and waddles in to the next room. In that room, he folds the sticker. A minute later, he is back, waving his hand around with the half folded sticker stuck to it and proclaiming that the sticker is broken.…
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Tonight is Charliepant’s first night in his big kid bed. While I was doing laundry or Facebooking or reading or something, Paulie made him his very own cardboard version of Bert & Ernie’s headboards. Because, as Charlie says: ERNIEBERT! ERNIEBERT! ERNIEBERT! (Also, as I write this, Viv is sitting next to his new bed reading…
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You are six years old today, and right now you are a humid little lump sleeping next to me in Mama’s bed. “Mama Time” you call it. It’s been six years, but I still don’t know exactly what I’m doing. Each time I get confident, each time I get the routine down, you go and…
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“I want a baby but I don’t want to make one so I will go out and buy one because I’ll be be rich because I’ll work at night too. I don’t want to make a baby because I don’t want to feel the pain when it comes out or when the baby kicks me.…
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Two-year old Charlie is talking, waddling, and goofing his way through toddlerhood. “I love you Charlie” “I love you too, Mama” “Charlie, where does love come from?” (This is reference to a favorite bedtime book, I expected a hand gesture over his heart). “Right here, from my butt”. (as he pat pats on the front…
girl at large 