I’ve been ruminating on being 50, dying younger then I planned, and what I want to be when I grow up.
It’s been a challenging few months; the recent down slope of this Cancer roller coaster has been a long, slow descent this winter and now into spring.
I’m working on a larger scale painting, something new and also challenging. Charlie visits my table each evening and offers his critique:
“I like it, it looks just like the picture except without that leaf”.
“I’m getting nervous.”
“Afraid you’re going to fuck it up?”
Oh darling yes. Exactly.
girl at large 
